A different kind of mother aka: Letting Go (some things)

...From the stomach flu episode, I cam to understand that being strong doesn't mean not asking for help, nor does it mean not being scared.  This is probably one of the greatest lessons I've ever received.  I needed to offload some of my responsibilities and free myself a little to manage the load better. I had to admit that I could no longer be the same kind of mother I had been when Dylan was little; it wasn't possible.

I could not be with the kids and be with Randy in the oncology wards.  I had to ask for help - and lots of it.  I couldn't cook dinner every night from scratch using fresh vegetables from the farmer's market, so I gratefully accepted dinners of any kind from the families at my sons' preschool. I don't know if they used organic produce, and I learned not to give it a thought.

I ordered take-out dinners using a gift card generously provided by my husband's colleagues at Carnegie Mellon University.  I even took people up on their offer to unpack my families possessions - yes, even my clothes and underwear...

Was I a lesser mom, wife, and woman for this?  No!  In fact, it made our lives better to let others pitch in.  I had more energy to devote to all of those around me; I wasn't so stressed out and grouchy. It made life seem more manageable, which in turn lightened my mood.

- Jai Pausch - Dream New Drams - pp. 63-64

Some ask how I do it - work FT, parent 5 kids ages almost 2 - 6 years...I do it as follows:

Grace of God.

A messy home.

Children who are bathed ~2-3 X a week.

Family activities vs. every kid in multiple lessons starting at age 2 years.
Focusing on what is really important: Faith, Love, Kindness, Obedience, mixed with some sillies!

With help.

PS - I really enjoyed the book quoted.  It's an easy read about a university professor who is dying - from his caregiver's perspective - his wife, Jai.  Their children were preschoolers during this time and one was just 4 months old at the time of diagnosis.

One Million Arrows

I just downloaded to Kindle yesterday and will likely come back and record some excerpts here:




Let us devote every child to God and His service. Let us STOP praying that our children will be saved if we are not willing to offer them for His service. Let us lay each child upon the altar. Let us seek this one thing -- that they may become worthy and equipped to be set apart for the service of the King. - 2218



We've been given the exciting opportunity to raise arrows - weapons of warfare. Our kids have been put on this earth for a great purpose and a mission. -2218


My biggest dream for my kids has become for them to always have at the core of everything they do - every motivation and thought - the desire to search for God's dreams for their lives, asking questions like:
How can I make a difference in this world?
What did God create me to do on this planet to help accomplish His purposes?
How can my life be truly fulfilling?
How can I become an arrow for God? -2218

Parenting that focuses less on what your family can do for God and more importantly on what God wants to do through your family. -2218